Please Hammer, Don't Hurt Em

It can be a little worrisome when Kaelan and daddy go out on their father/daughter dates and excursions, simply because my stomach can sometimes knot wondering what sort of music dad is pouring into that little sponge-brained kid of ours.   Let's face it, this Michael Jackson obsession stage we are going through right now.....completely her father's doing.   And the fact that she even knows who Winger and Poison are????  Again, the sin of her father.   Me, I try to expose her to the more refined side of music.  I give her healthy doses of  The Beatles and Beethoven.  I spice things up with Foo Fighters and Weezer.  Yes, I even give her the Bieber she so desires even though it makes my ears feel like they are being cleaned with Qtips dipped in acid.  But the 80's hair bands and the rap of his youth, I steer clear of those.   He feels it will be a gap in her musical knowledge, and therefore he takes every opportunity to close that gap.  
And that my friends is why Kaelan does things like this:

Vanilla Ice-"Ice, Ice Baby".   The world could have survived without that one, eh?   Yet my kid knows ALL the words to that song.  She even accused David Bowie and and Freddie Mercury of stealing Vanilla Ice's music when she heard "Under Pressure" on MY ipod.   I smacked Doug in the head for that one.   Are you kidding me?   Ice totally ripped that music off.

Now, if you were born after 1980, I realize that none of this post has made much sense to you.  In fact you should probably stop reading now, because this next picture will mean nothing to you.

 In fact, maybe ALL of you should stop here. 

This picture may scar you.

Yes, that is me.  Yes, I attended an MC Hammer/ Vanilla Ice concert.  Yes, I wore Hammer pants, and yes, I married a man who wore Hammer pants.  Yes, that is an African freedom emblem around my neck and sadly, I probably could not have told you who Mandela was back then, but I was stupid and that was the style.    

NO, I did not buy the ticket.  It was a gift. 

Does that serve as redemption?

Oh, but for the record, YES I could do the running man.

I  can't have my daughter listening to this kind of nonsense.  It brings up too many painful memories for me.   Just look at those shoes!  Oh, the pain.  Like a dagger in my heart I tell you.